Christmas Stuff

Dec. 24
Almost six months ago I was fired from the one job that I have ever been good at, and the best church I had ever worked for. It’s a pretty safe assumption that I wont be working for any other churches. I would do anything to go back but still that is beside the point. God would truly have to move on hearts and minds to allow that to happen. Still I was in the middle of a pretty cool study and series or I was going to be on stuff I learned from Daniel. Then I had a thought. What If I went on ahead and continued that series. What if I started from scratch, what if I went on ahead and wrote the sermons anyway, then posted them somewhere for anyone that would like to read and see what happens.

For almost 15 years give or take a year or two I have studied, written, planned and implemented some type of service and message, sometimes more than one. It’s been very hard to stop doing that. It’s been very hard to not impact students lives, and families lives. It would be different if I didn’t Love the kids from Collision or from any group for that matter but the fact is that I do.

I remember saying in the last meeting that I was begging for myself yes but also for my family and my kids, it strikes me now all these months later that I may have been misunderstood again. I didn’t mean my own kids. I love them and want them to be happy and have the best, I meant my kids. The kids of Collision. I miss every one of them and their families. I know that some of you are reading my blog. I’m glad you are. I wish that you would let me know even if it’s as an anonomous poster. Still I am going to attempt to at least once a week put up a teaching just like I would have been doing each Tuesday night. I don’t think I will ever use that gift again but I don’t want to lose it, I learned just as much as everyone else, probably more so.

Start looking for them they will probably be under a link or something. Who knows one day I may even start recording them and sticking the audio up. That will take feedback though.



Dec. 25
Well this is the day that I have been dreading for the past month. It’s Christmas day and all I want to do is cry. Amberly was given some money from Grammy and Pap Pap and immediately came over and handed it to me. She said she wanted me to have it. I have to stay strong, I need to not cry but it’s so hard to do. I am so undone. I wonder sometimes about Onesimus. The problem is I don’t have a Paul to write to the people at Harvest and tell them to take me back.
I’m not sure how the day is going to be. I just sit here and I think about Christmas and what it is and what it is supposed to be. I remember a simpler time when J and I first got married, I remember a more complex time when getting gifts was the best thing in the world because I could get her what I wanted within reason. I remember the joy of watching her open things and just being so proud. (there’s that word again) proud of the fact that I was able to give those things to her. Same goes for my kids. A house that is ours that sits in a town that is going to be dead in a year or so.




December 27, 2008
I know I already did vidblog for today but just had to pop up a little bit of a gloat. I have been able to win just about every game that we have played since coming here. This is made all the more sweet because of who I have beaten ever time we have played. Childish yes, but sweet all the same.